Sometimes it surprises me how many of us seem to be working with death, dying, or endings in a more general sense. It is amazing how much these endings are part of what we experience. As we are all human beings, death is part of our lives, in terms of both our own death and the deaths of everyone else around us. What I see is that many of us are working with the grief that arises from losing someb…

Can we imagine ourselves not wanting anything? Living in a place of desirelessness? Maybe we are afraid that it would be like being dead. Yet that is what the practice is actually leading us to. We learn to be held by life, to let life guide us, rather than being guided by desires. We learn to let trust guide us, to let faith guide us, to let peace of mind guide us. That is a different refuge. Our…

In the practice of Buddhism, you must find your own path. It is up to you to search for and discover the way to transcend suffering. The correct way to search is to look inside yourself. The path lies within the hearts and minds of each of us. So be tough and remain diligent until you reach the final destination. This reflection by Mae Chee Kaew is from the book, Mae Chee Kaew, (pdf) p. 242, compi…

“There are these five ways of subduing hatred by which, when hatred arises in a monk, he should wipe it out completely. Which five? “When you give birth to hatred for an individual, you should develop goodwill for that individual. Thus the hatred for that individual should be subdued. “When you give birth to hatred for an individual, you should develop compassion for that individual. Thus the hatr…

All too often we think that getting in touch with our emotions is a means of tapping into who we really are—that we’ve been divorced from our true nature and that by getting back in touch with our emotions we’ll reconnect with our true identity. But your emotions are not your true nature; they’re just as fabricated as anything else. Because they’re fabricated, the real issue is to learn how to fab…

Another way of the good friend is they reveal their confidences to you. What they carry deeply in terms of pain, aspiration, regret or joy, they reveal to you. This is precious, this act of trust whereby a person can reveal what is difficult or sensitive for them. When that can occur your sense of friendship grows beyond just liking someone; you have been given their trust. And you must never betr…

A monastery can feel like a secure place. We leave the world behind only to join an exclusive society of robed, shaven-headed confrères with shared aspirations, striving to live by the highest principles. But don’t think that monks and nuns float around in saintly harmony and meditative bliss. Monastic community is a melting pot of temperaments and karmic predicaments – with the heat turned up and…

Once the Blessed One was staying among the Bhaggas in the Deer Park at Bhesakaḷā Forest, near Crocodile Haunt. At that time, Nakula’s father [Nakulapitar], the householder, was diseased, in pain, severely ill. Then Nakula’s mother [Nakulamatar] said to him: “Don’t be worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time o…

What is the appeal of love? In the initial stage, it is an effective antidote to boredom for those who find life stale, uninteresting, filled with only drudgery or emptiness or for those who feel lost with no purpose for living. Love can create excitement and meaning. Falling in love is intoxicating, a welcome agitation. Powerful emotional ups and downs—as if regularly falling into hell and then r…

I have heard that on one occasion the Blessed One was staying near Rājagaha at the Bamboo Forest, the Squirrels’ Sanctuary. And on that occasion, when Ven. Upasena Vaṅgantaputta was alone in seclusion, this line of thinking appeared to his awareness: “What a gain, what a true gain it is for me that my teacher is the Blessed One, worthy and fully self-awakened; that I have gone forth from home to t…