Don’t allow yourself to hate one another. It’s only normal that when people live together, their behavior isn’t going to be on an equal level. Some people have good manners, some people have coarse manners — not evil, mind you, just that their manners are coarse. Physically, some people are energetic, industrious, and strong; others are weak and sickly. Verbally, some people are skilled at speakin…

Sometimes the act of compassion may be just in recognising one’s own fear and anxiety, those things which come up in relationship to people we meet. Often we sweep such anxieties under the rug for the sake of being able to smile and put on a polite social act; but is this really giving something of value to the other person? It’s difficult sometimes to convince ourselves otherwise, but I think it’…

When we do mettā meditation, loving-kindness meditation, it’s often good to start with ourselves. But when doing that, it is important that we not put ourselves under our thumbs—making demands about who we are and what we should be. When this happens, it’s as if we’re looking at the mind the way judgmental parents look at their child, power tripping and demanding that the child behave in a partic…

If we want to leave suffering and gain happiness, we must have wisdom. With wisdom, we need not suffer anymore. If we understand this principle, we can avoid any more afflictions. Actually, this reasoning is very simple. However, Chan sitting requires time. As it is said, Practice sitting for a long time and Chan will appear. Live in one place a long time and affinities will develop. Investigating…

In Buddhist tradition we talk about pāramitā, the field of good deeds. During the Buddha’s many, many lives as a Bodhisattva he developed the Ten Pāramitās: generosity, renunciation, virtue, wisdom, energy, truthfulness, patience, determination, loving-kindness and equanimity; and those wholesome qualities helped him to build up this field of merit – puñña. So when we draw close to such a person a…

Like the character in Through the Looking Glass who liked to think of two or three impossible things every morning before breakfast just as an exercise to open up his brain, it’s good to think about infinity: how long things have been going on and how much longer they could go on if you don’t get your act together. This also helps to put small issues from day-to-day life into perspective. They see…

It’s impossible for our ordinary mind to be clear, but we can direct our attention through the very nature of having a mind. We can formulate an intention and then direct thought and attention to that which is skillful and wholesome, that which brightens and allows the mind to feel a sense of ease. A lifting up of mind and attention, directing thought and evaluating result. Ask yourselves: “Is thi…

How is suffering to be understood then? Well, you have to be in the midst of suffering to understand it. Take aversion, for instance. Let’s say that someone walks into the room and they proceed to do something that annoys you. That annoyance then leads to thoughts like “This person is so irritating. Why can’t they be different? They need to stop doing that. I don’t like this person.” Or, if they’r…

Every desire aims at happiness. The problem is we misconstrue the happiness. We misconstrue what’s going to work getting there. So the Path is here to help us get a clearer idea of what true happiness might be like, and what works and what doesn’t work along the way. That way you can take the principle that “all things are rooted in desire” and use it to your own true advantage until you can final…

It is only natural that when we put on dirty clothes and our bodies are dirty, that our minds, too, will feel uncomfortable and depressed. However, if we keep our bodies clean and wear clean, neat clothes, it makes our minds light and cheerful. So too, when morality is not kept, our bodily actions and speech are dirty, and this is a cause for making the mind unhappy, distressed and heavy. We are s…