Red-Hot Coal and Bird

The household life is easy and difficult at the same time. It’s easy to understand what to do, but difficult to do it. It’s as if you were holding a piece of red-hot coal in your hand and came to me complaining about it. I’d tell you to simply let go of it, but you’d refuse saying, “I want it to be cold.” Well, either you drop it, or you must learn to be very, very patient.

“How can I just drop it?” you ask. “How can I just drop my family?” Just drop them in your heart. Let go of your attachment to them. Of course you still have obligations to your family. You are like a bird that has laid eggs. You have the responsibility to sit on them and look after them after they have hatched. Just don’t think in terms of my family. This kind of thinking is just another cause of suffering. Don’t think either that your happiness depends upon whether you’re living alone or with others. Just live with the Dhamma and find true happiness.

This reflection by Ajahn Chah is from the book, A Tree in a Forest, p.106.